Thursday, November 25, 2010 | By: Megan Held

Dedication Decided

I have not fully finished the book yet, but I figured the dedication needs to be announced. I had one before, yet it did not seem fitting with the book. This will sound strange, after working out and taking a shower I figured out who to dedicate the book to. Like always, I called my mom to let her be the first one to know.

I know that this is not going to be the best book out there, but it does not mean it does not deserve a nice dedication. After calling my mom to let her know she has approved it and now I can post it.

First of all, sorry to all my friends. My book is not dedicated to you guys. Here is the dedication:

This novel is for my Grandpa: Joseph Fernand St. Louis, 0ctober 26, 1926—January 10, 2007. He had once said that every good story had a dark side to it.
Now, I hope it is obvious why I chose him. Good news is, deciding on the dedication does not hinder my writing it actually encourages.
I am sure if I keep plugging away at my typing I will make great progress with it. Put in my writing movie, Finding Forrester, brewed my tea and am now ready to type. Not much to update on just yet. Still have not moved past page 201. That should change tonight.
Sunday, November 21, 2010 | By: Megan Held


My facebook page is gaining people faster than I expected. over 85 people now, and I am just shocked. For most of the people I went to highschool with, most were familiar with 1440, and my obsession with writing. Guess that hasn't changed much.

Hubby made a comment that he likes me better when I only have one book on the brain. Ops, my bad. Kind of working on finishing typing up one, which I have reached over 200 pages as of today, as well as handwriting two other ones. Let's hope that after I do my homework tomorrow night (sh...I did not do any today but hey, two 1 page assignments is nothing compared to the 5-30 page essays and projects I had at Brock) I can complete at least 10 pages. Good goal hubby orginally set when I tended to ask him often how many pages to type.

Sadly, the laptop died so the desktop is where I type now; which makes it a little difficult to listen to my music. I could use my iPod, but then I feel like I would be ignoring hubby more than usual while writing. Difficult for me because I do love writing to Breaking Benjamin. Just the way the songs are get me all hyped up to write the dark stories.

On the handwriting note, I am writing out an older book I was working on in to a newer book because I abused the original book it was in a little too much. For those who have seen me write they know how I tend to abuse my books because I bring them with me everywhere.

When it comes to the upcoming days I still have not seen anyone buy my book at the cafe, but I check up at least a couple times a week. Still shocking to see sections of my book displayed, whether people are reading it or not. As well, vacation is 30 days away, where I can read at least 5 novels and write in the sun. Hopefully not falling asleep in the sun doing either. A nice sunny place to write more dark, twisted novels. Suitable? I do think so. Do not expect too much writing to be done, I do need a vacation to replenish the mind. Maybe on the trip I will be able to think of the name of the book I am a chunk in to writing. Nothing has popped up in my head yet, but it is still early on.

Once again, thank you to everyone for the support. I know I say it a lot, but it is true.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010 | By: Megan Held

Alas, no one likes me

I have come to realize that being an author is not as easy as people make it seem. To me it is my second nature, without writing I would not be the person that I am today. But, that does not mean people outside my group of friends and family will read my book. All the times I have gone to see my book display no one has even glanced at my work. Maybe it is just the clientele that is just tired of seeing stuff underneath the tables, or the fact that it is bits from a novel that turns them off.

I understand that people may not like my style of writing, that is fine. No writer is ever 100% liked, it is a fact. My feeling is that all the times I have supported other people on their endeavours has gone to waste because I get no support back. Sure, they write shorter things and most of the works are collaborative, does not matter in my eyes.

One day I plan to challenge people. To me, if I had not challenged myself to do what I have done I would not be writing books. Scary thought. Just imagine what I would be like if I did not release all these thoughts that appear in my books. Now I am scaring myself.

Instead of dwelling on the fact that people do not give a damn about writing outside my group of friends and family I am looking at the positive. Finished another novel, over halfway through typing up another one to self publish, working on two new books, and hoping to start looking into getting published somewhere in Canada. Alas, a lot of work, but important work.

"Writing is physical work. It's sweaty work. You just can't will yourself to become a good writer. You really have to work at it."~Will Haygood 

It is true. If I did not work at writing what would I say is my hobby and talent? 

Ok, enough of the never-ending rant. I was supposed to update, sold 2 books out of my 10. Still better than I had originally thought. Slowly getting back in to the writing grove again. Feels like writers block is kicking in, which sucks. I will beat it though. Hopefully soon I can think of the title for the book I am writing that is 90 pages in. We all know how that goes. I think of ideas and people perfect it.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010 | By: Megan Held

New Book Being Written

Just for all you followers, here is a little taste of the new book I am writing. Do not fear, I am still typing up my other one. So, enjoy. This is the opening:

      The feeling. How can one describe it? Orgasmic? Insatiable? No, fulfilling. I needed this, in some way or another. Sitting back on his thighs I looked down at my masterpiece. Just another fool that fell for it. Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes to enjoy it. Each breath allowed me to experience a new feeling: his going limp inside me, my sweat cooling on my warm body and his body not moving. Looking down at him I felt nothing. He was just a person used to fulfill my need. My gloved hands were soaked with his blood. The knife clamped in my gloved right hand dripped of his blood. It was dark in the room but I knew that there was blood everywhere. The smell filled my nose and gave me a rush of adrenaline, it was becoming orgasmic, much like the moment of killing him had been like.

     He had taken more effort to get him to the point of being killed. I had to go out of my normal methods and adapt which could lead to my risk of being caught. Yet, I was prepared. There was never a time that I was not prepared if I had to go further. It was not difficult to convince them to go back to their place, it never was. Tight dresses, sexy lingerie under them, high heels, make-up and knowing how to talk. Teasing worked too, just when to start and for how long was a challenge at times. Tonight he needed a lot of teasing because the alcohol did not hit him like the others. More effort, more wasted time.

     Looking down at him one last time I decided to get off of his limp body. A procedure needed to be followed. Too much DNA had been left on him, and I could not be caught just yet. I dressed quickly. Time was running out, and sleep was needed. His body would stay the way he was positioned. I moved over towards my purse and opened up one of the side compartments. In there was everything I needed to disguise what I had to do in order to get the satisfaction I needed. My routine clean up after every time was no more than five minutes. Just fast enough to escape, but not too fast that I left evidence behind. My method had been perfected years ago, and now it allows me to get what I need more often than I used to be able to fulfill it. Redressing I put away my cleaning supplies in the large purse I brought with me, slipped into my shoes and walked out of the room still wearing gloves. Looking back at him I smiled.
Thursday, November 4, 2010 | By: Megan Held

Book Display

The book display is up and running. Only sold one book, not that bad. I actually expected to not sell all. Sad but true. My taste and style of writing is not for everyone, which I do not blame people for. But, I am still in shock over the fact that my display actually turned out rather nice. The idea that I thought would not work did. Is it wrong that I want to set my goal at selling 5 books in total? It is not that much money, but it is still nice knowing that some people took interest in my book.

On a side note, my grandma and dad are really pushing the idea that I get my name out there and start to write to agents and real publishers so I can get officially published. Alas, they do not know that this takes a lot of time and effort and means a lot of rejection letters. Rejection I can do, but I do not know if they can handle it. I guess that is what I will be up to over Christmas break. Writing letters to agents to make them want to get me published. The question I have is, "Am I really good enough that an agent or publisher will want me?" Horrible thoughts to think of but sometimes being realistic is the best way.

For all the people that are waiting to read my next book I am halfway through typing it up. I did not realize it was going to be as long as it is. The only thing I can look forward to is that when I edit the word count goes down and it becomes more in tune with the entire concept. It is not my best book but even the books I find that I sucked at writing could be someone's favourite. I can aim to be done for Christmas break but that takes time and effort and I am slowly plugging along with it while I try to finish writing out my novel. I am close to the end of that one as well. It's hard to keep up with work, school, and writing...I guess I should mention a somewhat social life. Hence the word 'somewhat'.

I will keep everyone updated. It is a good idea to have support close to me when I need it the most.

"You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you."  ~Ray Bradbury